Robot HR 3035 is Coming to Attack Your Cell Phone

In Politics, Technology on December 2, 2011 at 11:02 pm

I have two phones, a cell phone service and I have a cell phone. Guess which phone rings the most? Yep, the land line despite the fact that I never use it and none of my friends have that number. I couldn’t even tell you what it is. So, why does that phone ring so much? I mean, who the HELL could be calling me numerous times per day? Robot callers. Those damn robots callers! And, if the Mobile Information Call Act of 2011 is passed by a Congress that loves corporate business, Robot HR 3035 will find you where ever you go.

Robot callers are basically phone calls from God-knows-which company to sell you something, or they could be from a bill collectors or something. We’ve all experienced them and we hate it. We hate it when someone, whether it’s a robot or a real person, calls a number that we did not knowingly give them and tries to sell us shit, bug us or otherwise wastes our precious time.

Apparently, the cleverly worded Bill finds a way to get around the laws that currently restricts them from calling your cell phone. Prepare to be horrified!

First, since an automatic dialing system is illegal the bill redefines what that is. Their argument? They don’t use automatic dialing systems anymore. Dialing is old technology (sneaky bastards). The new technology will allow them to ‘target’ specific callers. But, how in the name of star 69 can it be legal for them to target you, huh?

The second strategy from HR 3035 states that your phone number is your consent. Can you believe this load of crap? Consider how many times you sign up for something and you are required to give them a phone number. Well, if this bill passes it will be legal for them to call that number for any reason they want, for as frequent as they want and in any way they choose to (consider text messaging) because you gave up your phone number. As far as they’re concerned, if you didn’t want them to call you you wouldn’t have left you phone number.

And, the last most witty strategy that Robot Bill HR 3035 is using to strip you of your cell phone privacy is they promise not to call you to deliberately sell you anything. That’s good news, right? Wrong. What this means is the dogs we call bill collectors will have their leashes completely removed. As for everyone else they will most likely change the way they call you. For example, since your purchasing habits clearly show that you like shopping at the Gap they will call or text you from time to time to inform you that the latest V neck sweaters and matching art-less t shirts are available at your nearest store.

We love our smart phones. We love the many things we can do on them and more importantly, the way they are private extensions of our self. It hurts almost when we break a phone or someone steals it. The endless applications and customizable options of today’s smart phones attaches us to them unlike the old rotary phones or pagers even.

A cell phone is your club house. An Android phone is someone’s country club. An iPhone, your studio apartment. Today’s phones are your haven of privacy. But, prepare people, for the HR 3035 Robot callers are coming!

All kidding aside, if you’re just as pissed about this as me click here. It’s a petition. Easy and quick to fill out.


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